Pause to eliminate fear
We seem to leave in a world that promotes fear:
Fear about governments
Fear about the economy
Fear about job security
Fear about the environment
Fear about deadly viruses
Fear about relationships
Fear about employee retention
The list could be long. You can add your own personal and private fears to the list.
Many times people seem paralyzed. For example, they can’t make good decisions about moving forward. Whenever we talk about those situations and look deeper, the most frequent reason for that paralysis is fear. Many don’t like to recognize their underlying fears, but until they do, and find a way through the fear, it’s impossible to take action.
The problem is that when your brains detect fear, it goes into "fight, flight, or paralyzed" mode. The moment that happens, cortisol and adrenaline flood your brain and prevent your reasoning powers to be engaged. As a result, nothing positive or rational has the most remote possibility of taking place.
Why do you need to pause
That’s when you need a pause. A few minutes to breathe, calm your brain and your emotions, and get out of the constant rush of always doing and never pausing to reflect.
When you get out of automatic, you can then do something about your fears. The only way to let go of something is to bring something else in its place. To let go of fear, you need to bring in positivity. A practice o gratitude is the best antidote to fear.
The best antidote to fear? Gratitude!
Gratitude? you might ask. How can I be grateful in the midst of fear? By focusing your attention on something positive, no matter how small:
The ability to freely breathe. Have you stopped to think how difficult your life would be if you had to be constantly connected to oxygen?
The freedom to express yourself both about what you like and what you don't like.
The feel of your lover’s hand in your skin.
The uninhibited laughter of a child.
The hug of a friend, after a period of forced quarantine.
The creativity of your team when everyone had to change the way they collaborate.
A breakthrough in a difficult challenge.
An unexpected window of extra time to finish an important project.
Again your list could be long. To keep your brain from being flooded with fear, you need to make gratitude a daily practice. It doesn't take much time. Take 3 minutes a day (or one minute three times a day) to pause, take a couple of deep diaphragmatic breaths, and bring to mind the image of something you can be grateful for, preferably something that just happened, or happened during the day. Then hold in your heart that feeling of gratitude for 30 seconds.
Repeat this consistently for 45 days straight and you would have developed the practice of gratitude. It doesn't work to practice gratitude only around special occasions, like Thanksgiving, or a retirement party. It has to become a consistent daily practice.
You will find yourself smiling more, connecting better to others, and in better health. You will be more successful as a leader. The better part? Fear will not have such a hold on you anymore!
And if you want to make it more fun, challenge family, your team, or your organization to also practice gratitude. If you are leading a meeting, and you start getting a lot of pushback about something because people are fearful of consequences, or not finding enough money, or any number of things, try taking a few minutes to ask questions about finding things to be grateful about that same project.
You will be surprised how a more positive culture results in higher productivity and engagement.
I challenge you today to practice gratitude, no matter the circumstances around you or in you. Let us know how it goes!