Dale Carnegie's communication tips

I read Dale Carnegie’s book How to Win Friends and Influence People in the late 1960‘s, when I was an early teen, living in Cuba. I remember how my hungry mind devoured every page.

Even at that young age, I could intuitively feel that his writing was timeless. Much of what he wrote is just as useful today for effective business communication as it was when it was first published in 1937. This is because Dale Carnegie had an understanding of human nature that will never be outdated. Therefore, I decided today to share with you some of his quotes about Communication

On listening

Listen first. Give your opponents a chance to talk. Let them finish. Do not resist, defend or debate. This only raises barriers. Try to build bridges of understanding. ~Dale Carnegie
And so I had him thinking of me as a good conversationalist when, in reality, I had been merely a good listener and had encouraged him to talk. ~Dale Carnegie
If you disagree with them you may be tempted to interrupt. But don't. It is dangerous. They won't pay attention to you while they still have a lot of ideas of their own crying for expression. So listen patiently and with an open mind. ~Dale Carnegie
Let the other person do a great deal of the talking. ~Dale Carnegie
So if you aspire to be a good conversationalist, be an attentive listener. To be interesting, be interested. Ask questions that other persons will enjoy answering. Encourage them to talk about themselves and their accomplishments. Remember that the people you are talking to are a hundred times more interested in themselves and their wants and problems than they are in you and your problems. ~Dale Carnegie

On Words

Perhaps you will forget tomorrow the kind words you say today, but the recipient may cherish them over a lifetime. ~Dale Carnegie
Let us praise even the slightest improvement. That inspires the other person to keep on improving. ~Dale Carnegie
Any fool can criticize, condemn, and complain - and most fools do. But it takes character and self-control to be understanding and forgiving. ~ Dale Carnegie
There is only one way under high heaven to get the best of an argument - and that is to avoid it . ~Dale Carnegie
A man convinced against his will is of the same opinion still. ~Dale Carnegie
Ask questions instead of giving direct orders. ~Dale Carnegie
Asking questions not only makes an order more palatable; it often stimulates the creativity of the persons whom you ask. People are more likely to accept an order if they have had a part in the decision that caused the order to be issued. ~Dale Carnegie

General advise on communication

So the only way on earth to influence other people is to talk about what they want and show them how to get it.~Dale Carnegie
Be honest, Look for areas where you can admit error and say so. Apologize for your mistakes. It will help disarm your opponents and reduce defensiveness. ~Dale Carnegie
Merely stating a truth isn't enough. The truth has to be made vivid, interesting, dramatic. You have to use showmanship. ~Dale Carnegie
There's magic, positive magic, in such phrases as: "I may be wrong. I frequently am. Let's examine the facts." ~Dale Carnegie
In talking with people, don't begin by discussing the things on which you differ. Begin by emphasizing - and keep on emphasizing - the things on which you agree. Keep emphasizing, if possible, that you are both striving for the same end and that your only difference is one of method and not of purpose. ~Dale Carnegie

What do you think?

Do you apply today some of Carnegie's wisdom? In which ways can you use his advice? Share your thoughts with us in the comment session below.

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